(or how to have one !)
Wake up. Preferably outside
Wipe the sleep from your world and the slugs from your face
Pick up your portable hangover
to wear with your slept-in clothes
and yester-nights knickers
Decide it's a Bad Hair Day !
Lend it to a friend with instructions on how to wash it
(like, just don't)
Collect your complimentary twigs
and comb it with the hedge
(for that genuine slept - under - a - bush look)
Let someone else chew it (more fun !)
Decide instead to smoke yourself senseless
Go back to bed !